Did you ever hear the saying “He’s Not An Heretic (Epikoros) He is a Lustful (Baal Tava)?”
Leaving Judaism is not about questioning the existence of God (Epikorses) but about fulfilling forbidden pleasures (Taavos).
No one ever left Judaism because they have questions about God, they create questions as an excuse to leave and try to remove the guilt from their conscience.
For years, I have been speaking with and listening to kids and adults who left the fold in order to try to understand where they are coming from and what leads them to leave the fold.
A large amount of adults who left the fold or Off the Derech kids blame the questions they have in Yiddishkeit, questions about Hashem, questions about suffering of the Jewish nation.
Many of these kids and adults admit that they never searched for the answers properly and never put their questions before their teachers or any learned Jewish person.
Many will admit they have learning difficulties, they cannot comprehend the Torah or their bad experience in school left them with a bad taste in their mouth so they have a hard time sitting down to learn the Torah.
Due to the above, these people stay clueless and have no idea who Hashem is or how beautiful Hashem’s Torah is.
As a matter of fact: Hashem’s Torah and way of life is the most liberal way of life in the world.
All their questions have answers in the Torah. Many have very simple answers that are pasukim in the Torah, however, they are searching for excuses not answers.
In Bamibar 15:39 is says:
וְהָיָ֣ה לָכֶם֮ לְצִיצִת֒ וּרְאִיתֶ֣ם אֹת֗וֹ וּזְכַרְתֶּם֙ אֶת־כׇּל־מִצְוֺ֣ת יְהֹוָ֔ה וַעֲשִׂיתֶ֖ם אֹתָ֑ם וְלֹֽא־תָת֜וּרוּ אַחֲרֵ֤י לְבַבְכֶם֙ וְאַחֲרֵ֣י עֵֽינֵיכֶ֔ם אֲשֶׁר־אַתֶּ֥ם זֹנִ֖ים אַחֲרֵיהֶֽם׃
That shall be your fringe; look at it and recall all the commandments of the LORD and observe them, so that you do not follow your heart and eyes in your lustful urge.
There is a story told from the The Netziv who was Rosh Yeshiva of the famed Volozhin Yeshiva. He met an old student who was off the derech. The student walked over and greeted the Netiziv.
The boy who was without his kippa, tried to excuse his behaviors and told his former Rosh Yeshiva “I had lots of questions and there were no answers to my questions.”
The Netzive responded: “the answers to questions are found by the Rosh Yeshiva,” meaning if he had questions and was really seeking answers, he should have asked them from the Netziv.
The Netize then continued and said: “however, to your questions I don’t have the answers to, you know why? Because you have 1 question! You were enticed by the outside world, you got attracted to the תאוות of the outside world. The only question you have is how can you get those תאוות and not have a guilty conscience. You formulated lots of questions as an excuse to get what you want without feeling guilty.”
Basically, you formulated questions to answer to your way of life.
This is the truth for a large percent of adults who leave the fold. They create questions without learning the entire Tenach to get their answers just so they have an excuse so they don’t live with a guilty conscience.
Today there is no excuse not to learn and educate yourself as there everything translated to English and other languages and it is all for free. See Sefaria here https://www.sefaria.org.il/
Some men and women who left God went on to become idol worshipers by following or out right converting to Christianity. They claim that Christians had the answers to their questions.
These people admit they did not research it or learn the entire Tenach to get their answers.
They did not discuss these topics with Off-the-derech Christians. There are so many Christians who leave their way of life due to the many questions they have or when they see how false their way is.
Yes, there is an issue that the school system makes children feel that asking questions is wrong. However, everyone knows that Hashem encourages questions. You see on Paseach we do so many things in order to encourage children to ask questions.
Sadly, parents may be afraid of questions, as they may not have the answers. They have to understand that it is OK not to have answers. Parents of children who have questions should learn together to find the answers, or ask those who are experts in answering questions.
